The Ghost of My Board Results!!

It was a fateful day like any other normal weekday but with a twist. It was the #BoardResultsDay of 2010! I woke up, went to the bathroom when my phone rang. "Hey the results are out!". I was like you in that moment. A bit nervous, a bit scared. I was a good learner but somehow, I wasn't the cut to be on the top. I scored a 34 in Mathematics and a 95 in English!
(See, I said it! It was easy! ;p).

The two most extreme moments of my life. I was scared of my father of how will he react..at the same time..secretly happy for my 95. It was a confusing moment. So I took up the courage to give him a call and spit out the fear. Nothing happened as per my expectations. I was wondering a great gala of scoldings, many taunting reverts but strangely, nothing happened. He listened to my scores and hung up. Since he said nothing, I had a pretty much of a jolly time that day. My overall percentage wasn't even in the 70s. I was a science student but I knew engineering wasn't my cup of tea. However, fact was, apart from knowing this, I was unaware of what do I want to do next? English Honors? Uhm....maybe...certainly. Because that's what I was good at. Right? I thought so.

The DU cut-offs were high mayn! It was the first year of CATE and frankly, I don't even remember my scores today. Seems like I have an Alzheimers for mathematics and some numbers. I got a chance to enter Gargi with Physics Honors and even in the evening shift of a college in South Campus. But "jis gali jaana nhn, wahan jhaank-kar kya fayeda?". Since it wasn't how I wanted my life to be, I didn't choose any of the options. I'm glad. Had to bid goodbye to the great Delhi University.

I was..like you are right now. I was sad, I was troubled, my father didn't talk to me for years, my math scores were terrible, I attempted to harm myself and I practically did everything in my reach to come out of the "average" tag! Alas! I couldn't. Nothing changed in that time.

At last, on my birthday, a month later of the results, I got into Mass Communication. I was told to prove myself since my parents had to spend a fortune in my college fees. It was like a challenge I wanted to win. So, I topped 4 out of the 6 semesters and came second in one. Funnily, I even got debarred in one semester due to low attendance. Haha. Yet cleared all my exams and flew to the top again! I even topped my university twice in three years.

When I look back at all the fights I was a part of, all the times I thought nothing was worth it, and not to forget - having no one to hold my hand; I feel everything again and wonder- "Oh, how far have I come, yet I am still an average girl!". Yet, in spite of all the wrong things that I did or things which just happened on their own-

"I couldn't be more happier anywhere than where I am today!"

Today, I sit with the tag of an Editor in a reputed organization and I am happy, really happy. So just don't worry, everything that happens, happens for good! You may be dumb, you be a failure like me at some point of life. But you are the best of yourself. You tried your best, you gave your best and that's the process of growing up. I am proud of you and everyone who know they aren't too good to be a prodigy! And you will find a way out!

And one of the biggest reasons I wrote this is to tell you that your family loves you. No matter how harsh Dads and Moms are, people like us, the average ones, are also loved by some people around us. And in my case, I even have an added advantage, I've found the one who appreciates me for who I am. Loves me for who I am. I am glad I am alive. And I don't give a shit to the ghost of my board results :D

Best things happen at the right time fellas!! Just cling to that thought. xoxoxo

All the Best for the results,
Diary Dear!!

My Coach and Me!! ;)

Today the workout lasted for 20 minutes flat. We were late for our workplace so had to call it off. As read about DOMS, the pain remained to the butts today and vanished from the rest of the body. I am now a bit relaxed. The arms do pick some potential but relax on their own. I am liking the new regime. Just realized yesterday, that I have a tummy to tuck. Lolz. (People will faint hearing it.) But yes, it's the truth. :D A Beer Belly Yippppeeee!!!! :D That's healthy, isn't it? :P

I guess one thing that I can't ever skip in my diet is..uhm..a Pizza. :P I just can't. Niether chocolates nor beer. Oops. I guess the list has a few more entries. But please don't follow my diet chart, I have to put on weight and everything is safe until you don't overdo it so I stop whenever my tummy is full. :P I'm exercising, I need calories to burn! ;)

My coach added a new sprinting exercise to my fitness routine today. He said my muscles need to loosen up, stretch and relax before the exercise. Will help me to increase strength of the entire frame. So I guess there is another add on to my routine. Will be fun, will do it with him every morning. At least we can try to. (minus lazy ones). To be honest I feel a bit shy exercising in front of him. I've never done that before and it makes me nervous when I get noticed. A bit :P More so when I am not doing it with the right posture. *Sweat Drop*.

My water intake is rising gradually. I am hugely happy with this fact. But the best part was it didn't pain at all in my periods. Magical!! Not even for a second did I realize I was PMSing and bleeding. From the core of my heart I request all the Gulabi Gang and Feminists (No Offense) to go on an exercising morcha! It's gonna help you a lot. Mentally, Physically, Emotionally. Spare the men for some time. Ofcourse, to do it or not to do it, 'your choice'. :D

What?? you don't exercise???

Too Bad!
Diary Dear

You Wanna, We Wanna ..Yeahhhh,,,,Exercise! :D

I thought to write this blog after a week but then, women are a bit impatient. Aren't they? Last night's sleep was a spa! Relaxing and rejuvinating. Yet when I woke up, three not-so-good things happened. First was that I had hit DOMS! (it's Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness) so my body ached with most of the movements. Second, my fitness coach had developed a stye in his eye. And thirdly, I had to come to the office alone :( Not a preferable beginning to my mornings.

Oh yes, did I mention DOMS. This reminds me, that I am on an exercising spree. Fully motivated. Last morning I even did workout for 40 minutes including lunges, squats, push ups, pull ups, spiderman push ups and a few more to count. Even I am not too sure when did this new obsession erupted in my veins! Perhaps 2 nights back when in between the conversations my new coach, who happens to be my loving partner, made me do some muscle strengthening regimes. I was excited to try some more and so we switched to youtube where Joanna Soh gave me a good weekly set up to begin with.

I wasn't doing it to become fat or thin. I love myself. But I did it to feel fit from inside. Because since I did it last, my body called for more. I felt attracted to it. I guess that's how people get obsessed with gyms and fitness centers. They feel it from within that something is working upon their bodies. No doubt, looking better is on the cards anyways. I was entangled too. I loved that rush of blood in my body while doing the strengthening reps. That's why, my body is aching right now.

Anyhow, I'm loving it. Did a bit of stretching today as well with the help of my coach. Ouch! and I am still waiting for the next morning to begin my workout again. As I say, rest and eat to see the best show..a month into it and you will know! :D By the way, you should try it too.

(P.S. Get Well Soon Baby)

See you tomorrow,
Diary Dear

An Amateur's Old Playlist

The music in your I-Pods or your cell phone playlists, brings so many neurons from your past! In mine, I have many punjabi movie songs worth doing Bhagda on :D And some of the greatest sensual types.Mainly because they were the songs which were great to sing and suited my voice. Irrespective of how the song's like, I loved them if they matched my throat. My partner in crime doesn't really comment on my choices in music. He has heard them so many times now after hating them, that he sings them with me :D *Tu Zaroori Sa Hai Mujhko..Zinda Rehne Ke Liye* :D

Back home, these singing sessions are hilarious when he deliberately takes out female voices and acts like a new hottie in town or the hero in love-dripping movies :D I love him. He makes me laugh my lungs out!! And somewhere in between it's like a real movie of a real life. I believe all of it and it gives me a chance to become an actress myself ;)

Well, I have been funny at instances too. Specially when high. Dancing to 'Coming Up Roses' was my latest dance number. :D I'm glad it isn't yet on Youtube :D. Else, I'd have to leave town and settle down somewhere in Himachal for peace. :P

After 'Bailando', I guess this hit has taken my foot to the dance floor, one after the other. And the second dancing number has to be 'No One Else Like You'. Oh it reminds me of Hugh Grant's music! 'Pop Goes My Heart' :D Christ!!!..It's a musical paradise!!

If ever I become a playback singer someday, I'd love to become the best! Once in a recoding studio after my chorus lines were over, the head of the studio said my voice loves Hollywood tracks. I'd like to try that once again. See if I still have the same love for music. ;)

***********************************************************************

See you in the studio,

Diary Dear

Affection Minus Public Displays

I want to travel soon to some place far off. A place yet to be explored. Where I feel I can breathe the air with nothing burning in it. A place which comes close to my experience in Manali. A place where my SD card loses memory. A place where I can eat, sleep, talk and walk like it's my home. A place out of this distraction of ISIS, Oscars and World Cup. A place which makes me crave to write about itself till I get out of words.



Where rain looks like a hundred thousand rainbow droplets.


Where the waterfall passing by the next hill becomes my favorite spot on Earth.
Where there are great, homely people around me whom I can trust forever that they would appreciate love and its supersonic consequences. Where I can run free, dance and sing and hop on spring beds without the fear of someone eye-ing around. In a room lit with sunlight and moonlight whose windows have a panoramic view of greenery and the breeze is just right. And most of all I want to hold his hand all throughout. Because there is no journey which will be as exclusive as it becomes with him. Not many people get this.



Sometimes I feel sad for the people who cannot understand the need to love and be loved. That holding each others hands and eating in a plate is not a public display of affection. It's just affection minus the public display. Funnier part is, that people involved in it don't even realize it 100% of the time. Because when you fall for someone, no matter how self dependent you are, you love losing yourself and doing those little things you never did. Though it sounds extremely mushy because I am a cancerian, but it's exactly what's on the platter of the couples.

Ironically, if some married newbies do the same stuff with their not-so-social contributions and additions to social media, the society accepts it readily. I feel pity for the people who believe love is only true from the moment you get married. And sad because they've missed the chance to love their partners early enough. All I've learned is, falling in love is a taboo here and expressing it too. Two friends sitting across each other and kissing each other on the cheeks is acceptable, married couples doing it is ethical but lovers share no space! Maybe MARS is for us. Earth is getting shallower!

Although I do agree there's a limit to everything but until then, people need to think over and let alone the couples. I don't say all relationships work out but I don't even agree that they don't. Why not give it a chance and go for it? Why not lend a smile to them and not creepy stares aunties? Why not notice how much they love each other friends? Why not talk it out, fathers? They might end up on your terms to get married and get an official stamp and a license to express love. But before that, a learners' should be allotted. Right?



After falling in love I have started to appreciate people in the same worlds. It's always the feeling I can understand the best. No matter how many times I have to convince people, but I will. Because I want to go to that trip and to all the trips like that with him for the rest of my life without somebody stopping me and asking, 'Shaadi Ho Gayi Kya?'


See you...in the hills..
Diary Dear!

In Love with Manali

It was a long weekend of early October when we decided to visit Dharamshala. However, time was very generous upon us and we couldn't get the tickets instead we booked ourselves in Manali. Let me tell you one thing, I wanted to go to Manali since I was a small little girl wrapped up in red-white frocks and brown bellies and socks. I was never 'In' for Shimla for my Honeymoon as much as I was for Manali. And then when I grew up, I saw YJHD. Lolz. That made things more clearer to me. :D

Sorry for the last part, but I had to confess, I love the romantic bollywood cliches.

I had always visited the lower lands of Himachal with my family all throughout my childhood and a few years ahead of it. But then, I was too young to interpret the beauty of the hills, too young to realize the calmness in the rushing waters of the river, too young to experience risks of life from the cliffs,too young to wake up to the peaks of Himalayas! I was too young to believe I will ever visit someplace else other than Una, Chalet. This doesn't even count on Google Maps, does it?

But, I did. That too with the man I love. I loved Manali like anything. And I've even planned my next trip. Shhhh... This time I guess I will concentrate more on the photography because Manali is so damn beautiful you just can't leave the place without at leat 2000 photographs. That's the ideal place for photographers. It is actually a Heaven.

We reached with a lot of hassles but the journey was worth it. I couldn't sleep waiting for the mountains. And when I saw them, I couldn't sleep at all. I cannot forget the first look of the mountains with a little light of the sunrise. They looked like... your first love. They looked like your first kiss. They looked like your newborn baby!

They made me alive. I couldn't stop gaping and uttering WoW..Oh My God...Wowww....

The long, never ending, carved roads moving narrowly up and down the hills were a dream come true for riders.The offroad route was way too dangerous but was the best part of reaching Manali. We saw all angles of Himachal mountains. All the steeps and cuts. God's a marvellous architect I tell you. The Beas looked like a huge closet of accessories. A box of liquid diamonds. A sparkling neclace of jewels. It was prettier than that.

We even entered and took an exit from the Mandi Tunnel (or called the Aut Tunnel) of about 2.8-3.0 kms. Mind you it was an experience! We even got a few splashes of water by the mountain sides. Small arteries of Beas keep flowing out of the mountains all over Himachal. Don't worry, you won't miss it.

In no time we were in Kullu. And our journey slowed down since we were now a part of the city. It took a while to reach but we were finally there at around 5pm. Oh by the way, we boarded bus at 7pm the previous day. Almost a day long journey it was. It surely doesn't take that long but our drivers were first-timers. (Wasted hell of our time). Anyways, Aleo Left Bank was our destination. Though we were tired, yet I pulled his hands to walk till the hotel.

My good, that was a hell of a walk. The huge Deodars covering upo with a beautiful weather welcomed us. Yes, I will talk about the trekking we did on these roads. Uff. By the time we reached our Hotel, it was 5:30 and we surely would have been desperate to jump in our beds and get some sleep. But the magic of the Beas right across our "beautiful hotel room" took our tiredness away. We hot-showered and laid for a while absorbing the amazing journey we had and got ready to hit the (Mall) Road of Manali.

It was getting chilly so we had to take our winterwears out. Mall road was another trek. The same as any other Mall Roads of India but a bit more vibrant and hustled. It was Dussehra time and due to the extended weekend, it seemed like everybody in the world was inside Manali.Fun, it was! To me one minor drawback was the lack of ATMs in Manali. Around our place only two were there. Out of which one was always out-of-order while the other worked. So brace up to get into that line. But it wasn't that much of a problem.

We sat in our balconies at night talking about our journey, the hills, the place, the hotel and slept after a few drinks.

Day 2 was the most adventurous.
I opened my window and wiped the water droplets from the glass and saw the great Himalayan Peaks guarded by the clouds slowly. Oh what a sight! I fell in love with it. We ordered Bed-Coffee and were skeptical about if the manager will extend our stay for a day more. Finally after a bit of thoughtful drama the ball was in our court. He extended our stay and we headed to Solang Valley. Another marvel of nature.

The sight of the world from there was one of the brightest memories of that place with me.

I am sure you'd love it. Oh, I forgot to quote the 'paragliding' and 'paragliders' we saw right infront of our eyes. Scary but took us into the air! Ooohh!

That night we drank till we dropped and kept talking by the balcony about everything in life. I don't need to tell you how time stopped. Do I? I love him so much for everything.

On Day 3 we watched Haider in Piccadly Theatre before boarding the bus. The AC of the bus was super speedy mayn! I almost freezed. But the best thing on our journey back was the driver. A very aged and punctual man whose words were more funnier than any slapstick comedy! He was a Khadoos uncle but with a soft heart. Nariyal Head! :D He drove like it was a racing car and drank tea everytime we halted at any stop. Thankfully he didn't throw us and all passengers out for asking him to switch the AC on and Off all the time. Some of the college boys in the bus stole apples from another vehicle in a traffic jam. Dude that was hilarious.

I am very sorry to announce that we reached Delhi around 11 and Manali was again 600 kms far away. :( Anyhow, I thought of compiling everything somewhere to remind myself how splendid my trip was.

"Thank You sooooo Much Love for this trip. You don't know how much I loved it. I will always be thankful to you to book those tickets and coming up all the way only for me. My pre-honeymoon was out-of-this-world. ;) I love You, Thank You"

Muah!

4 Days and Diwali :)

Last Night I cooked a delicious Paneer ki Sabzi and Paranthas. Om Nom. I think it was yummmilicious! I've never cooked this good. Okay Okay. I have. But this was the best out of the rest 'Bests'. I wish I can have it again. Like Right Now!

It's Friday today. 4 Days to go.

We had our team lunch in the office today. Cholley Bhature for a change :D And the teaser  announcement of the Diwali Competition. Oooh...I am so excited and nervous, I want to know what it is. I wish somebody would actually tell me about it right away. I can't wait. I'm nervous about who will be my partner this time. Last time I was the luckiest to be paired with my love. FATE.


That's how our actual love story took a plunge...Remember???



How happy I was..I had started to have a super duper crush on him by then. I was so lucky the lottery chit had my name. We didn't win though but...it was a win-win the other way round :). I was gifted with a beautiful partner that day. I realized he was the one I can live with...all throughout my life.
(Some Content Deleted : Censored.. :P)

This time, I know, everyone will try that we don't make a pair. All Jealous and Biased and Unfair people.
"Haters are Gonna Hate Darling" :* ;)

Moreso, I am thinking..how will we be as professional rivals :D Oh Wait!... Who will be his partner? F*ck.
*PRAYERS*!!!
*Not a Bitch, Not a Dog* *I want him to win Lord.*

(Oh Shit, It Rhymed :D)

On the contrary this time, I am not at all concerned about if he gets a female colleague as a partner. I think in all these days with him, in all this while...I've left my past behind and have started to trust him more and our love in manifolds. I am stringed to him and his fate, and he is ; to mine. Okay? :)

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

I Love You Darling.
See You later Diary Dear